[ At least he's not in the herosuit. He’s in casual clothes, jeans, sneakers, a black t-shirt depicting a dog staring up, captioned ‘DOG LOOK AT AIRPLANE.’ ]
All good friends strike one another at some point. [ Said with the utmost conviction. ] So you could say that's the proof of us hitting it off.
Please don't strike a pose to close that joke out, Takaba-san. We're in public.
[ if anyone asks it's his distant uncle from up north that he just met, there's still a few male zen'ins alive, it's a reasonable lie in his situation— ]
Every time we meet I keep expecting you to look— different. It's weird seeing you in civilian clothes.
That's fine, I think. You're entertaining children and bored mothers, mostly.
I suppose I should say no inappropriate jokes, but... hey, what do you know about the sorcerer clans? You've been hanging out with us for some time now.
[ It's a good thing Tera is wearing a mask, because even though he had a little preview of what this guy is capable of before he tossed him in the basement, he absolutely did not expect — whatever the hell this is. Physics breakage? Magic? If his face weren't covered, he would be the very picture of stunned — and that's rare for him. He can't remember the last time he was caught so off guard. ]
Are you kidding me?
[ He isn't one to hesitate, but this time, for a second, he does, because if this guy can let himself out of basements via random doors, there's a good chance that the nonsense he's witnessed so far is only the beginning. But — what else can he do, except aim his pistol and say: ]
[ Tera's pretty good at getting jokes, but it still takes him a second to catch on, given the absolute absurdity of the situation. When he does, he groans audibly, because again: annoying. And also pretty dangerous, since there's no holds barred with this nonsense.
Which is why, when his fellow gang mate — the guy in the pig mask — says, "Enough of this shit," and moves with intention to shoot, Tera is quick to say: ]
That goes for you too.
[ Everyone needs to hold their fucks for the next moment or two. ]
You. [ He gestures with his pistol to their "hostage," the guy who has endless jokes, and then points it at the floor. ] Sit.
[ Simple, easy instructions, that way he doesn't twist them around again. ]
[ Tera might think his words were untwistable, but Fumihiko finds a way. He drops down in a wide squat (the censorship blob ends up between his legs, which is for the best), feet and palms on the floor. A pose remarkably like a dog. He even suddenly has the ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
@shadowban
[ He isn't SURE he got that response. But he's hoping. ]
Whaddaya mean, coming or going? I'm right behind you.
[ And he is. Now. He wasn't until he thought that would be hilarious, and then POP. ]
takaba-san please 😭
[ this technique is so damn a— ]
Please stop jumpscaring people, Takaba-san. Me, especially. I could've punched you.
takaba-san does as he pleases!
All good friends strike one another at some point. [ Said with the utmost conviction. ] So you could say that's the proof of us hitting it off.
takaba-san is a MENACE
Please don't strike a pose to close that joke out, Takaba-san. We're in public.
[ if anyone asks it's his distant uncle from up north that he just met, there's still a few male zen'ins alive, it's a reasonable lie in his situation— ]
Every time we meet I keep expecting you to look— different. It's weird seeing you in civilian clothes.
Don't shout about men asses in public.
[ He casually tugs on Fushiguru’s collar, just a smidge. ]
HEY
[ so what if it's a similar cut and a similar shade using similar cloth textures... everyone's a fashion critic suddenly.
he's gotten better at not flinching when people reach for him, though. ]
Like your outfit is any better, anyway. You look like an Akiba uncle, just without the merch tote bag.
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[ After a few seconds- ]
But don't try to borrow money.
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[ is he joking? maybe. the corner of megumi's mouth is threatening to twist upward. ]
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[ He clasps his hands to the sides of his head and gets extra wiggly. Being in public be-damned. ]
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[ hey fushiguro don't bully your elders—— ]
I'm more the type to paint the bench and take away the sign. Keep an eye out, uncle, I'm a menace.
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[ His head makes comical computer whirring noises, and when he sticks out his tongue there's an error message written on it. ]
Tch! Complicated moral questions are too hard.
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It's only complicated if you think you're going to fail the moral test, Takaba-san. Don't hurt yourself thinking too hard about it.
...Actually, can I ask you for a favor?
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[ Said with a finger pinching gesture, like all he has could fit into that tiny gap.
But then he nods, yes, ask. ]
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You're good at entertaining people, right?
[ hah. oh god, ha. ]
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Uh. Yeah. I'm a pro.
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You don't sound so sure, suddenly. You've hosted or entertained at parties, right?
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[ Inwardly he has his nerves, but he projects his confidence with a grin. He even gives a fist pump. ]
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I suppose I should say no inappropriate jokes, but... hey, what do you know about the sorcerer clans? You've been hanging out with us for some time now.
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Sorcerers have clans?
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[ to be very euphemistic about it. ]
We still have money, don't worry. We can pay for your time.
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[ A heartfelt hand on the shoulder. ]
You can pick a family, too, yah know.
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All my family are dead. Even the ones I chose for myself. I think it's bad luck for people to adopt me, and vice versa.
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[ Fumihiko casually opens a totally different door, entering the room from the other side. He stands in the doorway, holding the handle with a grin. ]
You're right! That door was locked, so I used this one!
[ They have no idea how weird his bullshit is. ]
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Are you kidding me?
[ He isn't one to hesitate, but this time, for a second, he does, because if this guy can let himself out of basements via random doors, there's a good chance that the nonsense he's witnessed so far is only the beginning. But — what else can he do, except aim his pistol and say: ]
Hold the fuck on.
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Okay, but I think this just put the rating up.
[ He waggles it, like a damp paper bag. ]
How long do you want me to hold this fuck on?
😂
Which is why, when his fellow gang mate — the guy in the pig mask — says, "Enough of this shit," and moves with intention to shoot, Tera is quick to say: ]
That goes for you too.
[ Everyone needs to hold their fucks for the next moment or two. ]
You. [ He gestures with his pistol to their "hostage," the guy who has endless jokes, and then points it at the floor. ] Sit.
[ Simple, easy instructions, that way he doesn't twist them around again. ]
thanks 🥰
Arf!
[ Give him a second. ]
Hey, wait a minute! You're the dog here!
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I've seen you be kicked through a wall, a little slip shouldn't bother you.
[ It was from the third storey... ]
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how would you like it to bruise your tailbone?
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Depends on why. Anything can be worth it for the right reasons.
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...outside of life-or-death fights, but that's a separate category of things. how many of those have you had, then?
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Slapstick!
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stick to it!
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does it not bother you, though? getting threatened with violence the way i just did?
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Once I got over the face.
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you're right. there's nothing to really worry about for now. no point in borrowing misery, right? or however that saying goes.
...what's wrong with my face?